Wednesday, February 3, 2010


So, life has really gotten away from me this month, my dear, TT. Especially, now that I realize we're in February. Upon the new year, I had so many T-centric plans: Finish your first and second year photo albums; find a preschool; write you a love letter at least once a month. . . . Well, the albums are still sitting in a closet; pictures still need to be ordered. A preschool still hasn't been found. And, the blog, well . . . hasn't been blogged. And, the guilt surfaces. . . I'm not doing enough. T-school, dance class, park time, zoo visit, insert random activity here, didn't happen because I ran out of time, or I was sick, or tired, or a number of other things. And, through my guilt, and trying to get stuff done, you were calling for me: "Mommy, I go hide now." "Just a minute," I said. (Sometimes, I say that too often.) And then my heart caught up with me-- in that moment, I realized, I'm so busy creating memories for you that I'm not savoring the little things that truly make up all that is a good childhood. I always say, ". . . it goes by too fast; I need to remember this moment." Yet, I often forget, and get so caught up in the stress of what needs to be done. It's not about the photo albums, the blogs, etc., for you to view as an adult that serve as proof for your good childhood; it's being truly present in your life now that creates memories for you to behold later. . . hopefully, treasure. And, that's a lesson I learned from you, my wise two-year-old.